10/10/20 @ 7:24pm
(EST) |UTC - 5:00
Location: Phoenix, Arizona
Posts: 569
Studies have shown that bisexuals generally do PREFER one gender over the other, although they feel some attraction to both. But the "mystery orientation" on F4F is "Bi Curious" ... What the hell is that? OK, maybe curious about the "other" orientation, but little/no experience? Yeah, but the question remains: WHAT is their primary orientation (So you know what gender is the subject of the curiosity)? The answer is that you have no way of knowing. It could be a straight guy curious about being with a man, or a gay guy wanting to try sex with a woman. (Wouldn't it be nice to KNOW that, when reading their bio? Just saying ...)
I have spoken to many models about sexual orientation. Three of my favorite models (who are quite popular on the site), are listed as Gay in their bios, and have told me they are actually straight. Two of those said the bios were filled out by their studio, without even asking the model for any of the answers (They also made up their fantasies, obsessions, desires, etc.) And both do get some users who are straight women.
And the first model I had a private with here, who billed himself as bisexual, was actually straight and was a bit homophobic (He told me I was his favorite client, since I respected him. He hated that other guys "hit on" him ... All together now: DUHHHHHH!) He left F4F, to go to a sleazy site where he could work with his girlfriend as a couple. Unfortunately, nobody cared, and he was not making enough money as a "couple" to live on. He went back to single sessions with men.)
No, I have no complaints with this (Surprise! ), just thought I'd share this and see if it spurs a discussion. I used to work on a gay hotline and the "Am I gay / bi / what?" question was the #1 topic of callers. It is more understood today, but I am surprised how many users I see in the chatrooms who are clearly just "exploring" their gay attraction. Thankfully, most of the models handle that situation very well.
Personally, I believe we are all born bisexual, in that we have the ABILITY to function with either gender, But obviously there is a PREFERENCE (even among bisexuals) for one or the other, and that is how we "label" ourselves. Quote
If this is the first, then I will assume that some simply did not find their kind of sexual orientation when filling out the profile. You know, many psychologists identify 19 types of sexual orientation (or maybe even more). So they just picked the most appropriate one - not straight, not gay or bi. For many, this is a matter of principle.
Many can say that this is nonsense and there are only three types, but it is necessary to respect other people's opinion and identification.
Well, you are also right, many profiles are filled with studio admins and the model does not have access to change the info. Many even forget what is written in the bio.
I can also assume that this is such a protection against unwanted deanonymization Quote
10/11/20 @ 10:35am
(EST) |UTC - 5:00
Location: Phoenix, Arizona
Posts: 569
My point is that sometimes it is not picked by the model. And "bi curious" does not really tell a user your primary orientation (gay or straight) which may be of interest to them.
Personally, I have no problem with a model listing anything on their bio that is meant to attract their target audience. Quote
10/13/20 @ 12:26am
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Location: IN YOUR DREAMS
Posts: 1,844
10/13/20 @ 2:34pm
(EST) |UTC - 5:00
Location: Phoenix, Arizona
Posts: 569
Agree completely. You are selling a FANTASY here, and - if you are not comfortable with that - you should go into some other line of work!
I recall a young model who was straight, but catered to gay users here. The problem is that he went through the entire day with a scowl on his face that was very noticeable. I had a session with him, then told him he should SMILE more. He explained he was straight and only "playing" at being gay because the studio insisted. I told him that was up to him, but, if he wanted to be successful, he has to remember he is SELLING A FANTASY to older gay men, and part of that fantasy is: HE enjoys it too! I got him to smile, and - every time I saw him online - I would pop in to his room and whisper-text him "SMILE, DAMMIT!" if he wasn't. He would crack up laughing, but would smile. After a few weeks of this, he contacted me and told me I was right, and he did SO much better after that, and was one of the most successful models for a few months before he left. Quote
Whatever the case, it is all a performance. Most of these guys are straight exhibitionists watching porn to keep themselves hard for you. I've asked a few questions to some of my favorites in the past that labeled themselves as gay, like what part of the male body turns you on as a surprise question during our privates and they stumbled in their answers or instead of describing it sensually and romantically, they would just say "uh...a big dick".
I once asked a previous model who had me fooled as a gay guy for a long time to give tell me how he would make love to his perfect guy starting with undressing him (as part of our private to get things heated up) but he stammered and stuttered so much that I aborted the mission so we just did a generic jerk off session and called it a day.
I don't look at their labels anymore, many guys don't even know what their studio puts on their bio. A lot of them have admitted they are straight during the conversations as well. There may be the occasional gay dude out there but more often than not, these are nice straight dudes that do not mind showing off their bodies and dicks, trying to make a living, an extra few euros to take their girlfriends out. Quote
10/19/20 @ 10:55am
(EST) |UTC - 5:00
Location: U S A
Posts: 212
So the fact they lie about their orientation is kind of a turn off for me. I wish i could know for sure but even if i ask a model if he is really gay, he will probably tell me yes thinking that's the answer i want (but it's not) and if i tell them i actually prefer straight master , of course they will just tell me "sure i'm straight". How much trust can i put into that when i know they have been lying to be what custumers want, they will just tell me what i want to hear and that's sad.
Of course, i know i am not the typical custumer but kind of the exception but still it is sad for me that i just can't know the sexual orientation of the sexy flirts i go pvt with. Quote
I get that studios probably train these guys to ask these questions but I just find them, along with a model’s sexuality, to be irrelevant. It’s not we’re actually ever going to have any physical intimacy anyway. Just give me a hot convincing performance and fulfill my requests/fantasy. : Quote
12/17/20 @ 12:41pm
(EST) |UTC - 5:00
Location: U S A
Posts: 212
12/21/20 @ 4:22pm
(EST) |UTC - 5:00
Location: Phoenix, Arizona
Posts: 569
Uh, no they are not.
Although it may seem vague in reality, science defines sexuality in specific terms: A heterosexual has sexual attraction to the opposite sex, homosexuals to the same sex, and bisexuals have definite attractions to both sexes. There are obviously other factors, as all heterosexuals are NOT attracted to EVERY person of the opposite sex. Many other things come into play, one's likelihood to try it (affected by society, family, possibly religious upbringing), the social situation involved, the chance of discovery by others, and possibly how their inhibitions are deadened by drink or drugs.
It is no secret that the vast majority of gay men (and lesbians) have had sexual encounters with the opposite sex. That is what society tells us is NORMAL, so it is what we strive to achieve, to some extent,
And a significant percentage of"straight" men and women have had sexual experimentation (if not acual relationships) with someone of the same gender. That does NOT make us bisexual.
Bisexuality is the "middle ground", but someone is considered bisexual only if they have distinct attractions to BOTH genders. It does not have to be equal attraction (In most cases, they prefer the opposite sex, since - again - that is where society pushes us. But the dual attraction is there.)
I worked on a LGBT hotline for 15 years, and received a lot of training in this area. Bisexuality is very commonly misunderstood, such as the original post mentioned ... assuming anyone who has a single same sex relationship "must" be bisexual. No, they are not. They are curious, open minded, perhaps a bit drunk/high, and the opportunity was there ... Hey, what the heck?
Actually, if you want to get into studies, Alfred Kinsey had an extensive theory that everyone is bisexual to some degree, since we all have the ABILITY (if not the desire or opportunity) to have a same sex affair. Again, many factors affect people in that area: society, religious upbringing, etc. Most further studies define bisexuality as a definite preference for both genders.
When callers would argue with me that they "must" be bisexual since they had that ONE same-sex encounter, I point out that I have ridden a horse, but that doesn't make me a cowboy! LOL Quote